When my mother died (40 years ago) my father and I went to the funeral home to finalize the arrangements she had already made for herself, which called for one evening of what they now call visitation, and that was all. "Private" cremation was to follow the next day, which only the funeral home staff would deal with.
We were required to pick out a casket. Even the half-way decent looking ones were expensive, and since it was only going to be used one night for the wake and then burned, my father asked if we could just rent one. The man said no -- it was against state health laws, because, after all, the person might have had a disease or something.
To which my father replied, "The next guy layin' in it wouldn't care much, would he?"
Nevertheless, we bought a casket.
A number of years later I got to thinking about having no muss or fuss when I die, so I called a local funeral home to inquire about possibilities. I found that the exact thing I want is known in the trade as "immediate cremation" -- no wake, no funeral, no nothing, they just take the body away and burn it. Remembering the bit about the casket, I asked, "Can you get a pine box for a coffin, or something cheap like that?"
The woman I was talking to said, "Yes, there is an inexpensive corrugated model that can be used."
"Oh, wow!" I cried. "A cardboard box! How cool is that?"
Although I couldn't see her, I could tell the woman on the other end of the line was sitting up very straight in her chair and stiffening her upper lip as she said in a very dignified tone, "It is a corrugated casket."
Yeah, yeah -- call it want you want. I want to go out in a cardboard box.
P.S. On the instruction sheet for the arrangements, my mother had checked the box for organ music at the wake, but there was a hand-written note in the margin that said, "Do not play 'In the Garden,' or I will get up and walk out." She meant it too.
No comments:
Post a Comment