Absolutely True

This is another story that involves a joke, although this joke is a tad raunchy. I hope I have presented it in a way that does not offend. It goes like this:

A young man was so in love with his girlfriend Wendy that he had her name tattooed on his, um … you know -- private part. When this part was, well -- relaxed -- all you could see was the W and the Y, but he thought that was fine since Wendy was the only one who should ever see it when it was … um, shall we say … expanded to the point where one could see her whole name.

They went to Jamaica for a vacation, and while there they visited a nude beach. The young man saw a Jamaican life guard at the beach who had a W and a Y tattooed on his … that same part … also, and he pointed to his own and then to the life guard’s, and said, ‘Hey! Look at us! Do you have a girlfriend named Wendy too?”

To which the lifeguard replied (supply your own Jamaican accent here), “No -- mine says, ‘Welcome to Jamaica, mon, have a nice day!’”

Okay, that’s the joke. Several years ago my partner and I were planning a trip to Jamaica, and we kept telling that joke -- or at least its punch line -- to each other. Whenever we got to talking about our impending trip, one or the other of us would say, “Welcome to Jamaica, mon, have a nice day!” If one of us said “Welcome to Jamaica, Mon!” the other would chime in on “Have a nice day!” This went on for a couple months. We couldn’t seem to stop ourselves.

So, there we were on the beach at Negril. A Jamaican native came walking along the beach to where we were vegetating under an almond tree, and the woman we were staying with introduced this dude to us as Mr. Black, although he called himself The Beach Master. He asked us if it was our first trip to Jamaica, and we admitted that it was. He said, “Well, let me say -- welcome to Jamaica, mon!” To which we both immediately replied in unison, “Have a nice day!”

His eyes lit up and he grinned from ear to ear and said “Ah! You know Wendy!”

I guess everybody in Jamaica does.