Ten Cents a Dance

There is a player on the Stanford women's basketball team whose last name is Tinkle. 

On second thought, I think I'll stop there.

I've been taking bottles back to the grocery store.  Michigan requires retailers to charge a 10-cent deposit on each and every vessel containing beverages specified, according to MCL Section 445.571(b), as "soft drink, soda water, carbonated natural or mineral water, or other nonalcoholic carbonated drink; beer, ale, or other malt drink of whatever alcoholic content; or a mixed wine drink or a mixed spirit drink." 

There were in the garage four 30-gallon bags filled with mostly Diet Coke bottles, with a few 7-Ups and Michelob Ultra cans thrown in, plus I had 36 glass bottles that had formerly contained Miller Genuine Draft, and one from a Seagram's wine cooler.  It took three trips to the store over two days, but I collected $44.20.  It's going into my casino fund.

When you arrive at the recycle area with a 30-gallon trash bag bursting with bottles and cans, there is always a blue-haired grandmother daintily feeding 12 Diet Dr. Pepper cans from their original carton into the machine who gives you that look that tells you she knows you haven't brought bottles back in months because you are way too lazy and are only doing it now because you need the money and/or you have had to start parking your car outside because there is no more room in your garage and she can't even muster up any sympathy for your poor sorry self.  In a case like that, even though you know she won't believe you, you give her a wink and say, "Great party!" 

It looked like I was going to have to try that trick today, but her attention was diverted away from me when two frat boys came in with three shopping carts full of empty beer cans.

I'll bet theirs was a great party.